Enjoy the Ride

Cedar Point

I grew up an hour from Cedar Point.

Hailed as America’s Roller Coast, Cedar Point is one of the greatest theme parks of all-time (personally biased, yes, but this is also validated by numerous critics and surveys, year after year).

Cedar Point is a 364-acre amusement park located in Sandusky, Ohio on a peninsula that jets into Lake Erie, one of the five Great Lakes. Opening in 1870, Cedar Point is the second-oldest amusement park in the United States, and for the past several decades, it’s been leading the industry with their world-class roller coasters, thrill rides, family rides, and entertainment.

Growing up on the farm, we didn’t have too many opportunities for vacation. Finances were one thing, but another primary driver was the inability to leave the farm for too-long of a timeframe since someone always had to be around to feed and water the livestock.

However, what we could do was take day-trips, and because we were within short driving distance to Cedar Point, this became a frequent destination for our family. We could take care of the morning chores, pack up the car, drive the hour to the lake, spend the day at the park, and the take a long and exhausting drive home to feed the animals before we went to bed ourselves.

I don’t remember the very first time I went to Cedar Point, but I do recall falling in love with it quite early on. I remember being amazed by the massive wood and steel structures that welcomed us as soon as we drove the causeway to the park, I remember the joy of the thrills of each ride, and I remember the warm feelings I’d feel getting to spend an entire day with my family, a day free of work and a day focused on fun.

This was a place that simply made me happy. Being raised on a farm, you grow up pretty quickly because work is part of the lifestyle. And while I was grateful for this ethic to be instilled from an early age, I also loved being able to enjoy being a kid while at Cedar Point.

Because of the harsh Ohio winters, Cedar Point was only open during the summer from May until October. Between spring planting and fall harvest season, this often meant the window for us to go to the park was between June and August. Most of the time, we’d only be able to go once or twice a year, but going to the park would be what I’d look forward to all-year long.

In the off-season (and essentially any night that I wasn’t at the park, even during the summers), I’d spend as much time as possible researching stats of the coasters at the park, drawing roller coasters of my own, creating my own designs, and writing letters to the park to give them my ideas. Oftentimes, I’d receive hand-written letters from park management (including the company CEO) telling them how they enjoyed my ideas and would take them into consideration for their next coaster. Sometimes, they’d even send me merchandise — I remember receiving big souvenier park maps that I’d hang around my bedroom.

It was pure fun.

Second to being a farmer, when I grew up, I wanted to be a roller coaster designer, working for Cedar Point and making other people happy.

Millennium Force

My favorite roller coaster was (and still is) Millennium Force.

Millennium Force is the world’s first giga coaster — a complete circuit roller coaster that stands above 300 feet tall. Opening in 2000 at 310 feet tall, the record-breaking ride drops riders at an 80 degree angle down a massive 300 foot drop into a large, swooping over-banked turn at 93 mph. From here, riders are taken through the first of two tunnels, then into a large airtime hill, two more over-banked turns, another airtime hill, the second tunnel, and final bunny hill, and a final over-banked turn before entering the final brake run. Comprised of stunning ocean blue track and grey supports, Millennium Force was the first roller coaster I fell in love with, and it was the one that took my breath away.

I wish I could recall the first time I rode it, but my memory is a little foggy. All I can remember is that it took me a few years to muster up the courage to actually give it a try. I was terrified of it. When it opened, I was 6 years old, and I’m pretty sure I wasn’t even tall enough to ride. I remember going to the park for a couple of years, looking at it each time and witnessing as my dad, my sister, and my cousin all rode it before I was willing to give it a try.

I can still remember the anticipation, though. As a little kid, I’d look up to see this giant behemoth of a steel monster standing in front of me. My heart would start to pound, and I’d start to shiver. The nerves would kick-in, and the fear and adrenaline would start to take over. As trains would pass by, one after another, I’d hear the roar of the wheels glide across the track as riders would scream in enthusiasm with their hands in the air, celebratory of an incredible ride and a beautiful journey. Then, once the train would come to a stop on the brake run, you’d witness the riders exclaim in excitement for the rush of exhilaration they just experienced.

The inspiration of roller coasters

I ask myself why I’m still so inspired by roller coasters. What is it exactly that’s so captivating?

Aside from the sheer engineering marvel of it all, and the fact that these beasts are larger-than-life when you see them in-person (they are almost magical), to me, it’s the emotional process that the rider goes through that’s so enticing.

At first, it’s the excitement of trying something new, risky, or potentially dangerous.

Then, it’s the slow-creep of the fear — the “Oh shit, what have I done?” feeling that starts to sink in.

Then, it’s the panic — the get-me-out-of-here feeling.

Then, it’s the point-of-no-return.

Then, it’s the ride itself — the feeling of holding on for dear life, the letting go and submitting to the process, the “I can’t turn back now, so I have no choice but to settle in and enjoy the ride.”

And finally, once the ride is over, it’s the accomplishment of taking a look back, seeing what you made it through, and celebrating the fact that you did it.

The process of riding a roller coaster is:

1) Acknowledging there is something you want to achieve

2) Digging within to find the courage to do so

3) Recognizing the range of emotions (from fear to panic to thrill)

4) Submitting and enjoying the ride

5) Celebrating your achievements

Life, itself, is a roller coaster.

We’ve all heard this analogy before, but I hope you feel it deeper now.

Yes, life is the ups and downs, the twists and turns of a roller coaster — but it’s also the sudden stops, the launches, the malfunctions, the accidents, the emotional volatility, the balance of fear and rush.

As I’ve settled into my first decade of adulthood, a big part of me regretted that I didn’t become a roller coaster designer. But in a way, I am.

I work with people through all sorts of roller coasters.

For the past 10 years, I’ve been supporting gay men through the roller coasters of managing anxiety, accepting one’s own sexuality, the turbulence of relationships. I’ve been supporting gay men and folks of all backgrounds, identities, and orientations to move from self-hatred to self-love — and what a ride that can be. I’ve coached gay men into newfound self-confidence, sexual empowerment, and stress-freedom, and those processes are quite individualized rides of their own.

And, I’ve been through all sorts of my own roller coasters, too. From divorce to sexual assault, financial stress, negative self-talk, self-hatred, and self-disconnection, I’ve been through some rough, rough rides. And yet, gratefully and thankfully, with supportive riders by my side, I’ve made it through to the other side, and so I’ve learned practical riding tips (also informed by my education) which I utilize as I ride alongside you in your journeys.

Indeed, I’m a roller coaster designer — helping people to create beautiful, enjoyable, fun, thrilling, and empowering rides that work well for them.

I help gay men identify the ride they want, and I strap in to join them throughout the process so they’re not alone as they travel through the various emotions that encircle the process.

Whether it’s through 1-1 coaching sessions, my self-guided coaching courses, or sharing my personal life story through my member’s only blog, I provide compassionate and empathic support to help fellow riders navigate the roller coasters of their lives.

It’s an honor to be here with you, and thank you for entrusting me to be part of the process of your life journey. If I can be of support to you to help you solve any of the problems you are going through as a world-class mindset coach for gay men, let me know by sending me an email. I’m here and beyond happy to help, any time.

Keep riding on.

All my love to you,
Kevin